Undead civil defense
The Washington Park Zombie Defense Initiative is holding its first meeting tonight at 7 pm at The Fountain ahead of the Max Brooks zombie talk at Sage. Update: The WPZDI has a recap of last night's talk.
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Comments
This is getting ridiculous. Look folks, zombies aren't real. This was fun for a while, back in 2005 maybe, but right now all this zombiephilia is just a pathetic game, distracting us from the very real danger that could rear its head at any moment. I'm talking, of course, about mummies.
... said B on Oct 28, 2009 at 3:08 PM | link
> I'm talking, of course, about mommies.
Fixed that for ya.
... said -S on Oct 28, 2009 at 5:03 PM | link
Looks like B is volunteering to head up our Museum Outreach arm. Who knows what eldrich horrors are being stored in the Albany Institute's 3rd sub-basement? This is just the kind of "go gettum" atitude we need at the WPZDI!
What are *you* doing to keep your neighborhood safe?
... said Sandor on Oct 29, 2009 at 12:47 AM | link
Ironically, I just got a flier in the mail yesterday commemorating the 100th anniversary of the Albany mummies at the Albany Institute. I wonder what special sort of celebration there will be? Or should I say...ritual? Coincidence? I think not.
... said Summer on Oct 29, 2009 at 3:04 PM | link
They laughed at first, but see? See? Oh sure, it seems like a harmless flier, but it's really indoctrination. Yes, mummies are harmless, come see them in a nice glass display case. Until they bust out and you're helpless while they devour your soul.
The real problem is that mummies aren't dispatched as easily as zombies. Remember, mummies don't have any internal organs. Those were all removed during the mummification process. So you can't just cut the head off, and forget fire -- as much as Hollywood wants you to think mummies are highly flammable, all you'll end up with with is an evil, shambling, undead, ball of flames after you. No, there are two proven (and one failsafe) ways to destroy a mummy:
1) Destroy the heart. The vital organs are removed and interred as part of the mummification ritual. Find and destroy the heart and the mummy will once again be rendered lifeless. Unfortunately, the vessel that contains the heart is probably part of some other traveling display or permanent collection.
2) Unravel the bandages. No really, this works, the only problem is it usually relies on a complex, Rube Goldbergesque combination of duct tape, a record player, and Scooby Doo.
The failsafe? Take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.
... said B on Oct 29, 2009 at 4:29 PM | link