Yes, back from the grave of old features, it's Overheard.
A guy is talking with his friends at Hudson River, when he casually mentions:
I want the water in my toilet to be more blue. I mean, it used to be really blue, but now it's only light blue. I want it to be more blue. Ya know?
We all have hard lives. And, in some cases, hard water as well.
original photo: Flickr user Titanas
Two women are in line at AOA's favorite bagel place discussing diet soda:
Woman #1: I'm lucky because I only like diet soda. I don't like the taste of regular soda, so I only drink diet.
Woman #2: Umm... no, I won't drink diet soda because it's made with Splenda or something and that stuff gives you heart attacks.
If I'm going to have a heart attack I want to do it the right way -- with bacon.
Two acquainted women run into each other at the Washington Ave Ext Panera:
Woman One: How's ________?
Woman Two: He's good! Eight brain surgeries, but he's great!
Everything truly is relative.
image via Flickr user brain_blogger
A man and woman in their early 60's having coffee at a bagel place.
Were you ever in the man cave?
Now what would I be doing down there?
I don't know, you're a state worker --I just thought....
Two women are walking along when one says to the other...
"I realized last night that every guy I have slept with has a masters degree or was working towards one.
So apparently I have an educational requirement I was unaware of..."
photo: Flickr user CarbonNYC
A mom, kids, and grandparents are lunching together at the Latham Panera. One of the kids -- a boy -- is wearing a t-shirt. The conversation turns to snot.
Grandpa: You know why a lot of men wear shirts like that tucked in, don't you?
Grandpa: So they can blow their nose in their shirts and nobody will know.
A guy hands over his letter to the clerk and asks enthusiastically...
Guy: "Hey, when are the Michael Jackson stamps going to be out?"
Clerk: "Uh." (pause, incredulous look) "That's probably going to be a few years."
Two guys are sitting in Uncommon Grounds, talking...
Guy #1: My wife really wants a dog but I don't really want to get into all that.
So the other day someone asked her "When are you going to get that dog?" And she says "right after my husbands funeral?"
Guy #2: Do you really think she's going to wait until the funeral?
Nic sent along this scene from Uncommon Grounds...
Male Customer: Hi, I'll take a re-fill of the House.
Female Employee: Sure, could you take your top off?
Male Customer: Umm... sure. No problem.
Two elderly ladies are standing outside the liquor store at University Plaza in Albany looking at the window display.
Lady #1: "Why didn't they have this stuff when I was drinking?" (continues slowly) "A Godiva... chocolate... caramel... carameltini? What the heck is that?"
Lady #2: "That sounds disgusting."
"Gary Busey is a monkey who eats snakes."
Mnemonic aid devised by two students studying for some kind of biology exam at Uncommon Grounds.
(Yes, we laughed. Hard. So did other people sitting around there.)
A boy, about four-years-old, and what looked like his father are bundled up at Capital Hills for some sledding.
Boy: The snow is cold.
Father: Yes, the snow is cold.
Father: Um... because it is.
A UAlbany student ordering a bagel sandwich at Uncommon Grounds.
Student: "Do you have chicken? You know, like chicken breast?"
UG Employee: "No. We have turkey."
Student: "Do you have pepper turkey?"
UG Employee: " Well, we have pepper. And we have turkey."
Two younger adults, a woman and man, are sitting in the Panera at Crossgates Commons. After an accounting of many drunken escapades, the woman concludes:
"What people don't understand is that it's totally accepted in my profession to be drunk at work -- or to leave work and come back drunk."
A group of six young adults is sitting around at Panera, joking with each other
A few snippets of conversation:
The group is passing around photos on their phones. One of the women points out a guy in a picture.
Girl: "He lost a bet and we were going to make him drink beer out of a bowling shoe."
Girl: "But the bartender refused to serve it that way."
A few snippets of overheard conversation from Friday's opening.
Younger student-looking guy to older alumnus-looking guy
"Yeah, I did hear about the strippers at the field house."
A trio of older teenagers/college students, two guys and a girl, are sitting at a table on a break.
Guy: Do you have your Halloween costume, yet?
Guy: Is it scary or slutty?
Girl: It's slutty scary.
photo: still from Mean Girls
Three people, a woman and two men, are sitting at table in the Uncommon Grounds in Albany. The woman answers her mobile...
"What am I doing? Sitting in a bagel joint doing statistics problems with my two friends. Yeah, fun sh*t, man."
A man and a woman are perusing the shelf of drain cleaners as closing time approaches at the Home Depot on Washington Ave Ext. The man picks up an item.
"We gotta get this one. Look, it's so strong they had to put the bottle in a plastic bag. It just melts the clog. And maybe the pipe."
A man and a woman are sitting on the steps of a walk-up. The man is talking about his day.
"So, I get to [address] Lake and it's an Ob/Gyn office. And I'm not sure what's going on. But I go in anyway, and you know, I'm just like 'Obviously I'm not here for the gynecologist.'"
A woman is waiting in line for one of the discount movies at the new movie theater at Colonie Center. An usher is handing out promotional flyers.
Woman: What do you know about this Sweeney Todd?
Usher: Not much. All I know is what I heard from Regis Philbin. He says it's really bloody and gory.
A stylish woman is having coffee on a sidewalk patio in Saratoga, discussing a recent date with a couple of male friends...
"So, I said 'You're not the first DEA agent I've dated, so it really doesn't impress me, you know.'"
A guy is exiting Washington Park on his motorcycle during the Tulip Festival. He's dressed kind of preppy, but not wearing any socks. A group of young adults is looking on, smirking.
Young Adult: Excuse me, sir. Why aren't you wearing any socks?
Guy: (Annoyed) That's what I do.
Then the guy revs his motorcycle loudly and takes off.
A man and a woman, both dressed in business attire, are walking down Hamilton Street in Center Square...
Woman: I have something in my car for that.
Man: Oh, yeah?
Woman: Yeah, Mucinex D.
Man: What's that?
Woman: It's a sinus decongestant.
Man: Yeah! Hook a brother up!
A group of kids is having lunch with their parents and their aunt, when the conversation steers toward what Mom looked like when she was a teen.
Mom: "I look better now than I did in high school."
Kid: "Mom, were you fat?"
Mom: "Yeah, I guess so. Thanks for asking."
Overheard earlier at Panera. Yes, we spend too much time there.
A man and woman are gift shopping in the housewares section at Target.
"Well, what are you thinking you'd like to get her?"
"I just don't want to get something that's going straight to the gift graveyard."
A dad in a suit and tie is getting a drink from the soda fountain for his fabulously dressed (sun glasses and everything) little girl...
Daughter: Why can't we stay longer?
Dad: Because we have to go to the John McCain rally, Sweetie. We have to do all we can to keep the Democrats out of office so we pay less taxes and limit entitlement programs.
A guy runs into a couple of buddies in a popular Caroline Street takeout joint. "OOOh... sorry I missed your party, guys," he says kind of sheepishly. "I went home to convince my girlfriend to go -- and she convinced me to stay."
Two women are talking over drinks at The Wine Bar & Bistro on Lark Street
"So whatever happened with that guy? Did that work out?"
"No. I'd have to tie him up and gag him to get him to come to a place like this."
Three young women in cocktail dresses are making their way down the corridor by the Cheesecake Factory at Colonie Center. One of the women seems to be, well, very drunk. The two other women are propping the first one up as they walk along.
Inebriated young woman: "I'm falling out of my dress!!!"
Friends: "Shh! Shh! Shh!"
An older couple is shopping in the cookware section of the Marshall's in Clifton Park:
Older Lady: (holds up smallish pot) Look, for pasta!
Older Man: You can't cook pasta in that, you need a big pot!
Older Lady: So, why do you cram it into that pot we have at home?!?
Older Man: Because I have more skill than most people.
Two young women are munching popcorn before an afternoon showing of Juno:
YW1: "Wait a second, gluttony means eating too much?"
YW2: "Um, yeah."
YW1: "Oh, we are so going to hell."
(more popcorn munching)
"I'm not really a cheesecake guy."
-a server's response when asked about his favorite cheesecake